By Paul

   
Good lines were often used more than once, and some became more or less trademark sayings for certain situations. Some of the better known:

Good!

Said by Samantha when she has set things right, usually after she has gotten Endora to butt out.

Heard in: 1, 2, 5, 7, 13 (twice), 21, 26, 28, 30, 35, 43, 44, 67 (Darrin to Samantha), 69, 74, 76, 93, 99, 103, 104, 106, 110, 120, 127 (Endora to Samantha), 164, 169, 243, and 251.

"You don’t believe me?"

Said by Samantha to Darrin.

Heard in: 1 and 28.

"I've done a lot of thinking (the past few days)."

Said by Darrin to Samantha after he realizes he can’t give her up despite objections to witchcraft.

Heard in: 1, 17, 22 , 76 (about Tabitha being a witch), 108, and 164 (Darrin to Larry).

Witches honor.

Said by a witch to a witch accompanied by a hand signal that includes making a "v" out of the index and middle finger and holding it up on either side of the nose with the thumb extended in some cases.

Heard in: 2 (Endora), 62 (Endora), 97 (Endora), 126 (Samantha to Darrin), 127 (Endora), 157 (Endora), 163 (Endora and Samantha), 187 (Samantha gives the sign to Darrin), 195 (Endora), 210 (Endora), 212 (Samantha and Endora make the vow after Samantha asks), 215 (Samantha), 219 (Serena), 223 (Samantha and Endora), 240.

"I’m a WITCH, not a _________."

Said by one of the witches when expected to perform a task.

Heard in: 2 (magician - Endora to Samantha), 67 (parking lot attendant - Samantha to Charlie Leach), 83 (electrician - Aunt Clara), 93 (car manufacturer - Endora), 118 (Doctor not a veterinarian - Dr. Bombay), and 128 (magician - Samantha to Darrin).

We are quicksilver...

Said by a witch to persuade another witch (or mortal who has been extended supernatural powers).

Endora to Samantha when Endora is trying to get Samantha back to witchly ways. Heard in: 2, 104, 180 (Maurice to Darrin), 211 (Endora to Samantha),

"What we look like on the outside" speech.

Said to someone who is more concerned with another's looks than his/her character.

Heard in: 3 (Samantha to Darrin), 15, and 51 (Santa to Samantha & Darrin).

Son-of-a-Gun!

  

Typically said by Larry to Darrin when Larry thinks Darrin has done something special. Also said by and to others.

Heard in: 4 (Barker about Samantha), 12 (5 times), 31 (7 times), 35, 46, 52 (Darrin to Larry), 59 (client to Larry), 87 (Larry to Ben Franklin), 101, 104, 110, 117, 120, 120 (Endora to Darrin), 122, 123 (Darrin to Larry), 124 (twice), 126, 127 (twice), 149 (twice), 150 (twice), 150 (Samantha to Darrin), 152, 174 (Samantha to Larry), 174 (Samantha to Larry), 175, 178 (Larry to client), 180, 181, 181 (Samantha about Larry), 187, 191, 197, 198, 202, 205, 206, 210 (Darrin to Larry), and 252.

"So, sue me."

Said by Samantha to Darrin when she uses witchcraft.

Heard in: 4, 114, 123 (Samantha to Mortimer), 200, and 217.

"If the shoe fits..."

Typically said by Darrin to Samantha when witchcraft goes too far.

Heard in: 5, 96 (Darrin to Endora), 132 (If the "allusion" fits--Darrin to Samantha), 148, 164 (Samantha to Endora), and 203 (If the "voodoo" fits--).

"I’m sorry, Sam---" speech.

Said by Darrin to Samantha after an especially stupid move on Darrin’s part.

Heard in: 5, 132, and 252.

"Are you calling me a liar?"

Said by Samantha to Darrin when she denies using witchcraft.

Heard in: 5 and 148.

"I do have some imagination."

Said by Samantha to Darrin when he blames her creation on witchcraft.

Heard in: 5, 148, and 252.

"I knew you’d understand."

Said by Samantha to Darrin when he finally sees it her way.

Heard in: 6, 7, 17 (twice), 108, and 124.

"It was the least I could do."

Said by Samantha to Darrin after she lets a girl slap him.

Heard in: 8 and 194.

"Touch what and go where?"

Samantha to Darrin, when Samantha is jealous .

Heard in: 8 and 233.

"That’s my gal."

Said by Endora about Samantha.

Heard in: 9 and 35 (a repeat scene).

"Smile on its beak" speech.

Said by Darrin (when drunk) after Samantha has used her powers.

Heard in: 9, 70, and 130.

"If there is one thing I can’t abide, it’s a stool pigeon."

Said by Endora when someone spills the beans on her plans.

Heard in: 11 and 240.

Oh, my stars!

  

Said by Samantha when things go astray.

Heard in: 12, 19, 27, 28, 40, 45, 52, 57, 59, 62, 65, 93 (twice), 109, 115, 116, 124, 128, 136, 137, 157, 159, 162, 171, 176, 179, 182 ( the "Oh, my goose! It's Mother stars!" variation), 190, 197, 200, 206, 218, 220 (twice), 226, 231, 232, 234, 238, 242, and 253.

"Can I speak (talk) to you? When? Now!"

Said by Darrin to Samantha when a situation develops.

Heard in: 13, 14, 17, 44, 61, 97 (Samantha to Darrin), 99 (Samantha to Darrin), 122, 159, 187, and 248.

"You behave yourself!"

Said by Samantha to various people and things.

Heard in: 13 (Samantha to Darrin), 75 (Samantha to Tabitha), 115 (Samantha to spooks), 123 (Samantha to Mortimer), 129 (Samantha to Tabitha), 145 (Samantha to Serena), 169 (Samantha to Tabitha and Endora), and 210 (Larry to Darrin).

WELLLLLLL!

  

Said by Samantha when she does not know how to explain something.

Heard in: 29, 32, 35, 42, 44 (twice), 53 (twice), 62, 65 (twice), 66, 72, 73, 75, 81, 86 (twice), 90, 92, 94, 95, 100, 105, 113, 116, 117, 118, 119, 121, 122, 124, 130 (twice), 135, 137, 138, 140, 143, 145, 147, 152, 156, 157, 163, 165, 168, 170, 173, 174, 185, 192, 193, 194, 199, 201, 203 (twice), 210, 211 (Serena), 214, 217 (Serena), 221, 225, 233, 236, 243, 245, and 254.

"The only one that got away..."

Said about Samantha by a rejected suitor.

Heard in 30 (Warlock George), 125 (Warlock Rollo), and 209 (Warlock Ashley).

"The quiet ones are always the worst."

Said by Larry to Darrin when he thinks Darrin is having an affair.

Heard in: 31 and 152.

The North Won!

Said by Gladys to Abner when Abner has his nose in a Civil War book.

Heard in: 31 and 152.

"Are (Is that) you in there?"

Said by Samantha when someone is locked in a spell.

Heard in: 41, 59, 145, 205, and 210 (Darrin to Samantha).

"Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth."

Said by Samantha to a client.

Heard in: 46 and 60.

"Why did I say that?"

Said by many people who had been under a spell.

Heard in: 67 (Barkley), 123 (Mortimer), 140 (Haggorsdorf), 153 (Larry, Mrs. Sebastian), and 226 (client).

Mustn't Twitch!

Said by Darrin or Samantha to Tabitha when she starts using witchcraft.

Heard in: 75, 76, 103.

"One more word from you and I’m ______."

Said by a warlock/witch irritated with Darrin.

Heard in: 77 (Maurice to the three witches), 147 (Arthur to Darrin), 175 (Maurice to Darrin), 178 (Uncle Arthur to Samantha), 199 (Endora to Darrin).

"What do you expect, poetry?"

Said by Endora after removing a spell with out rhyme.

Heard in: 97 (Samantha), 153, and 195 (Samantha to Darrin).

"No more bloody Mary’s for breakfast."

Said by an outsider who has seen witchcraft.

Heard in: 105 and 147.

"Oh, my goodness!"

Said by Samantha when surprised.

Heard in: 108 and 148 (twice).

"I earned every one of them."

Said by Larry in reference to his white hair.

Heard in: 111 and 247.

"That’s an apology?"

Said by Darrin to Samantha after one of Endora’a or Maurice’s apologies.

Heard in: 120 and 141.

"Good grief!"

Said by Samantha when she sees a problem.

Heard in: 122, 148, 167, 171, and 184.

"How did I know that?"

Said by various people who learn something under a spell.

Heard in: 123 (Mortimer) and a variation in 251 (Tabitha says, "I don't know how I knew it, but I did" after Endora makes her a girl genius.)

Whoops!

Said by Serena when she blows it.

Heard in: 125 (by Samantha), 142, 145, 151 (by Samantha), 225 (by Samantha).

"I couldn’t live without you" speech.

Said by Darrin to Samantha after a particularly bad problem.

Heard in: 127 and 171.

"Tote that barge... "

Said by Darrin, usually to Samantha, when she complains.

Heard in: 132 and 196 (Samantha to Serena).

"It would have been funnier if I had said that."

Uncle Arthur when Samantha bests him in a joke.

Heard in: 150 and variation of "I wish I'd said that" in 165.

OK, who's the wise witch?

  

Said by Samantha when someone plays a trick.

Heard in: 161, 180, 195 (title of the show), 196, 209, 211, 240.

"Who said that?"

Various people after being under a spell.

Heard in: 167 (clerk), 169 (Larry), 170 (Larry).


Please send in other phrases or known episodes that aren't reflected
on this list to bewitched@harpiesbizarre.com for investigation.

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